We named our daughter Addison Love…because she was made out of love.
When we learned that her due date was either 02.09.12 or 02.12.12 we panicked and told our OB that we did not want her to be born on Valentine’s Day! A little girl with the middle name Love born on Valentine’s Day…yikes, how could we do that to our child. Our doctor assured us that she wouldn’t let that happen.
I loved being pregnant. From the moment we saw that first positive pregnancy test, we were in love with our sweet baby. In one second, everything changed. Our future…the rest of our lives…our priorities, our plans; everything changed in that one tiny second.
We weren’t “trying” to get pregnant. Not long after we started dating we talked about whether we’d have children or not. I can’t remember who brought the subject up first, but the question was, “How many kids do you want?”
- Stephanie: 0
- Todd: 4
We “compromised” on 1.
Given our ages we honestly never thought it would happen for us, but it was so much fun to talk and dream about. We named Addison probably two months after we started dating, and we’ve talked about life with Addie ever since.
We talked about the three of us spending Christmas Eve and Christmas Day in our Christmas fort (like the one in The Holiday)…letting Addie climb in bed with us during thunderstorms…reading to her at night…bath time…making all her baby food from scratch (no McDonald’s!)…taking turns with her middle-of-the-night feedings…having her cook and bake with us so she could learn fractions the fun way…teaching her to read…spending summers on a vineyard in Tuscany, letting her stomp on the grapes…
We were walking through the Atlanta Botanical Garden with Todd’s parents a few months ago, and his dad said, “I can picture her now…wearing a long flowery dress, and Birkenstocks. On the beach.”
“Yep,” I said, “that’s Addie.” He laughed, and said how wished he could take her to McDonald’s. LOL.
Once we learned we were pregnant, the nesting began in full-force. We knew we’d need lots of space for all her things; clothes, books, toys, swings, pack-n-plays, strollers….babies have a lot of stuff.
We spent an entire weekend cleaning out closets and donating most of my clothes, because, in a year or two am I really going to want to wear that again?? Todd moved lots of things up in to the attic, and we bought several shelving units and organized our bonus room so I could turn part of it in to a pantry and make room in the kitchen cabinets for bottles, sippy cups, etc.
We spent an afternoon at Pottery Barn Kids picking out furniture for the nursery and starting our registry. We went to Baby GAP and GAP Maternity and bought her first onesie (Batman, courtesy of Todd), and my first two maternity dresses.
We researched so many things, including how to make baby food, how soon we could start using a jogging stroller, all the different kinds of travel, stroller, and car seat systems, childcare options, and which bottle systems are best.
We talked about fun things to do for a child’s February birthday, like going to Disney with all the grandparents (because it’s not too hot in February), and ideas for fun winter indoor parties like the aquarium, dance and gymnastics parties, and pottery painting and other arts and crafts parties.
Addison changed us in so many ways. Her 11 weeks here with us were important, and she has forever changed our lives.
Before we found out we were pregnant, I had a completely different attitude about having a child. Todd and I have always said that our family is complete; with or without a child. Whether it’s just the two – or three – of us, we are happy and have a beautiful life ahead of us.
We agreed from the beginning that we would not do fertility…we would not “try”…we would just let nature take its course, and if it happened, it happened. We wanted to be sure that we always put our relationship first.
We still feel this way…and at the same time, we now know the joy of having a child in our lives. So, we will now need to learn how to walk this fine line. Fortunately, we have good relationships with great therapists who I believe can help us navigate this new territory.
Before getting pregnant with Addie…I sooooo wanted a little girl. Now, that just doesn’t seem nearly as important to me. I look at Todd, and how amazing he’s been through this entire process…the pregnancy, and the loss of Addie…and I think how proud I would be to raise a son like his father.
Once we found out we were pregnant, I panicked a little, knowing that because of our age we’re at higher risk for multiples. Thinking of twins excited me; thinking of triplets terrified me.
Now, finding out that I’m pregnant with SIX babies would thrill me!! I have no idea how we’d manage…but I know we’d find a way. And each of them would be the most amazing gift ever.
Addison has changed me…and I know she’s changed Todd too.
She’s changed #us…she’s brought us even closer together. All my life I’ve been so determined to be independent…determined to not depend upon anyone.
And the one thing I know right now for sure…is that I would never make it through any of this without Todd. He is the love of my life, the man of my dreams…and he is the most amazing father to my sweet, beautiful daughter, Addison Love.